Seth Godin wrote a terrific post this morning about customer service titled, “You’re right!”  He shares his experience of writing a letter to complain about poor service only to receive a letter back from the proprietor that shouts, “You’re wrong!”

Why do business people argue with their customers?

It happens all of the time. Why? What’s the point? Who actually “wins” this argument?

It doesn’t matter who is (technically) right. It doesn’t matter that you can prove that the customer is wrong. What do you have to prove? That you can turn an angy customer into an enraged - and most likely - former customer? What’s your point?

I hope that, by now, you see that the only answer you should give is, “You’re right!”

When you manage a customer complaint by saying, “You’re right!,” you are practicing empathy. Empathy is not sympathy. Empathy is not admitting that you are wrong. Empathy is not capitulation to a customer’s demand(s).

Empathy is saying, “You’re right, that is frustrating.” Or, “You’re right, I can see that you are disappointed.”

Sympathy is saying, “Oh, that’s too bad,” and then walking away from or hanging up on your customer.

Empathy enables you to connect with your customer - on an emotional level. Empathy also validates the customer’s feelings. He or she is angry; they are disappointed; they did not receive what they had expected.

You are saying, “You’re right…” You are not saying, “I am wrong.” You are seeking a solution - together. Even if that solution is to recognize that you should not continue to do business together in the future.

A classic example of the latter comes from the book, “Nuts! Southwest Airlines’ Crazy Recipe for Business and Personal Success,” by Kevin and Jackie Freiberg. The story is on page 269. I first heard Jackie Freiberg relate this story more than 10 years ago and it resonated with me:

A regular customer, one who frequently wrote in to complain, sent a particularly nasty letter to Southwest Airlines. The letter writer complained about their boarding process, their lack of meal service, the lack of a first class cabin, the cheerful attitude of their flight attendants, etc. In short, she complained about everything that Southwest Airlines did and did not do.

The customer service department was not sure how to handle this particular letter so they “bumped it upstairs” to Herb Kelleher, the co-founder and “colorful” CEO at the time. After carefully reading thie letter, Herb calmly wrote,

“Dear Mrs. ____, we will miss you!”

Sincerely,

Herb Kelleher

Great story! Great strategy! Great customer service!

What’s your story? What experiences - or nightmares - can you share with our readers?

Add your comments below.

What a blast from MY past! Last night I got an email from one of my old friends - Bob, the guitarist in this (ancient) photo!

He was in a nostalgic mood and decided to “Google my name” to see what came up. Lo and behold, he found my website and sent me an email. I’ll bet that it has been over 40 years since we last spoke. This is a photo of our combo, “The Variations,” playing an 8th grade dance for my elementary school back in 1964. That is me on the (amplified) Accordion! Jimmy on Sax and Rick on Drums. Seersucker sports coats and blue pants complete the costume! Unbelievable!

Our group broke up during my Junior year in High School and that was the last that I ever heard from any of the guys until Bob sent me his email last night. I went searching through my archives to find a photo - here it is - VINTAGE!

We used to rehearse in the basement at my parent’s house. We usually played one or two gigs each weekend - everything from a Bowling Banquet to a Wedding Reception. My dad would transport us to th job in his Plumer’s truck.

I later “upgraded” to a Farfisa (portable) organ with a Leslie Speaker. Still - we never had a Bass Player. Either we were “too cheap” to split the pot 5 ways or I was that good at adding the necessary bass lines - I doubt that!

We played “cover versions” of the hits of The Beach Boys, the groups from The English Invasion - Dave Clark 5, etc. The showstopper in those days was “Wipeout!” So 60’s. So much fun! Such great memories!

Bob writes to tell me that he is still playing - down at the Jersey Shore and at over 1,000 weddings. Way to go!

Hey maybe we should reunite and enter into another “Battle of the Bands” contest. I remember that we got 2nd prize in one of them back in Philadelphia, PA- at the (long defunct) Lit Brothers Department Store. I remember that our prizes were a box of chocolates - 1 box for each. I remember giving my chocolates to my mother. It was “Mother’s Day” that weekend - How convenient!

Do any of you have similar memories? Anyone still playing in a group? “Wanna Play?”

Share your stories with our readers. add your comments below.